Not So True Fairy Tales
by SmilesThroughFandoms
Summary: While waiting for her new baby brother to be born, Thor and Jane's daughter asks the Avengers to tell her stories to help pass the time. Let's just say they divert from the original script, just a bit... (Rated T for language)
**Hello followers! I'm having some trouble with After Ultron's next chapter so I'm hoping this'll help. Anyway, this story is purely comedic and AU. Like, Thor-and-Jane-have-a-3-year-old-daughter-and-a-son-on-the-way-and-Loki-is-on-Earth-as-punishment-and-is-now-kinda-neutral-and-and Bruce-came-back-eventually-also-Tasertricks-is-a-thing-and-is-also-after-** _ **Age of Ultron**_ **-but-Pietro-lives-also-Avengers-know-about-** _ **X-men**_ **-and-** _ **Deadpool**_ **so… Yeah.**

 **I'd like to thank my friend** _ **Brightcloud0915**_ **for helping me with character matches. I owe you, Ninja!**

 **Disclaimer: I own none of the characters or fairy tales that will be featured in this story. I only own Frida. Nothing else.**

 **:..: :..: :..:**

Frida Thorsdottir was bored.

Frida Thorsdottir, who had been sitting in this boring hospital waiting room with Daddy's friends and her Uncle Loki and Aunt Darcy. That is, until Auntie Nat took Aunt Darcy to find her another type of doctor because Aunt Darcy kept getting sick and throwing up. Frida thought it was because of her strange eating habits lately, but didn't say anything.

Anyway, she had been waiting in this hospital waiting room for four whole hours (at least, that's what Uncle Steve told her, Frida couldn't really tell time yet). Uncle Sam and Uncle Bucky had volunteered to take her home and put her to bed, but Frida had outright refused, saying she wanted to wait here. She wanted to wait here for her new baby brother to come out of Mommy's tummy so she could be the first one to kiss him on the cheek.

Seeing as how she was surrounded by every single Avenger and they would all more than happily let her use one of them as her pillow, Sam and Bucky didn't push too hard to get her to leave.

But by her Grandfather's beard was she bored!

Uncle Bucky, Uncle Sam, Uncle Scott and Uncle Clint had all gone down to the cafeteria to get something to eat, Uncle Pietro, Uncle Peter, Uncle Rhodey, Uncle Bruce, and Uncle Vision had gone to another part of the tower to get some sleep, and Auntie Nat and Aunt Darcy still weren't back yet. Leaving only Uncle Loki, Aunt Wanda, and Uncle Tony with her in the waiting room. Glancing around, the toddler found her Aunt Wanda watching the news on TV, her Uncle Loki reading one of the magazines, and her Uncle Tony nodding off in his chair.

" _I'm boooreeed!_ " Frida announced, startling Tony.

"You're bored?" Loki asked her, in the condescending way children doesn't acknowledge until they're older. The child nodded and Loki's brows dipped into a frown. "Well, what do you want us to do about it?"

Frida thought for a moment before her eyes lit up. "Tell me a stowy!"

"A story?" Wanda asked.

"Uh-huh! Aunt Darcy always tells me the best bedtime stories when I spend the night." Loki grimaced a bit. Whenever Thor and Jane left for "business" they would always leave Frida with Darcy and himself. The stories Darcy told to the girl were always long and they cut time into his and Darcy's, er, "business". Yet, he loved the child very much.

Besides, Darcy was always in his arms once morning came anyway…

"What kind of story?"

"Like Boot-e and da Beass. Like Lil' Mermaid and Pincess and da Fog."

"Oh," Tony smirked, sitting up a bit more, "the princess wants a fairy tale."

"Yeah, yeah! Fairy tale,"

"I think I know the perfect story—"

"No." Loki and Wanda chorused.

"What'd you mean, 'no'?"

"We mean," Wanda clarified, "that your stories have the potential to be scarring."

"How would you know?"

"We work with you every day," Loki deadpanned, "it is a given by now."

Tony scoffed and crossed his arms, looking offended. "Well, jokes on you two. I happen to have the perfect, age-appropriate fairy tale. About… Uh, fairies and a villain's magic curse and, um… True love's first kiss! Yeah, that sounds like a typical fairy tale…"

"What's it called?" Frida asked, interested. Before Tony could think of a name, Frida raised her hand. "Could you put a 'Venger in it? Like Aunt Darcy does."

"Darcy puts _us_ in her stories?" Wanda asked, surprised.

"Uh-huh. Sometimes she puts everyone in her story."

Tony thought for a moment, and then smirked, a twinkle in his eyes which Loki and Wanda found unsettling. "Ok, runt, I got the perfect story for you."

"I got a bad feeling about this…" Loki pinched the bridge of his nose, pulling Frida just a bit closer to him.

Tony cleared his throat. " _Once upon a time…_ "


End file.
